I didn’t know why I was angry all the time. Why I took trivial things out on those closest to me. Why happiness seemed so far away, it could never be touched, it could never be for me.
Why did everyone else in the world seem like they had a better life than me? Why did I hate people I did not know? Why was jealously destroying me from the inside out?
Because I didn’t know who I was, or what I wanted to do with my life.
When we were in our teens and twenties, all my friends seemed to have a life plan. To have things together. They had certainty in what they wanted to do. They had girlfriends. They had it all figured out. At least that’s what was in my head.
I never worked hard in college, I didn’t live up to ‘my potential’, whatever that was. I went to University because all my friends did. I studied Business because I wasn’t committed to anything, and it was the most open subject. Hopefully this would lead to more options at the end of it, so I could remain uncommitted to making a life decision for even longer.
I never realised the power of self-analysis, looking yourself square in the face and asking the difficult questions. Some people go through life as the angry, unhappy, bitter person that I used to be. Never knowing or ever having the courage to figure out what was making them that way.
Thankfully, I had a desire for success, whatever that may be for me and I knew that I had to understand myself to achieve anything.
I had the courage to look deep within myself and understand what was causing my resentment. I just needed a clear plan. Not a career plan, the average person must have at least 10 careers in their life, careers change as the world and people themselves develop. I needed a plan to improve myself to a point where I could achieve anything I set my mind to.
Over many years I worked hard to learn who I was, what I demanded of life and how I would get to where I want to be. I am still on that path, and always will be. The most successful people recognise that learning is a never ending exercise and improvement should be sought, however small, every day.
I still get angry at things too often. I worry about the past and I get anxious about the future, which takes all the energy away from today. This is stupid. Today is what matters, and it is all you can control. If you improve every day the future will take care of itself, you will become a superhero version of yourself in time.
So, how can you begin your journey to superhero status…?
Write down everything that scares you, makes you anxious or nervous.
This is just for you. Keep it once you’re done, burn it, throw it away, write an article about it, whatever. It doesn’t matter. The power here comes from just the writing down. Thinking about it alone isn’t good enough.
If you write it down, it becomes real, it opens you up. Things come out on the paper that you never knew were inside of you. You can finally be honest with yourself, understand who you are. When you face your demons head on like this, they flee, they have been caught out, and they can be controlled. You become the boss of your own mind. Fear is just a state of mind, you can control it, and with practice and courage you become free.
Anger is just a form of fear, if you understand what you are really afraid of, you get the power. Anger is left defenceless and will retreat back to where it came from.
This shouldn’t just be a one-time thing. Everyone has their own unique fears and these change as we go through life. Repeat this whenever you feel like you need to, retain the control you have so courageously earned. Be a superhero.
Do you have a similar tactic to share? Let me know in the comments and share your story!
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Related reading – How I try to be Less Stupid